babies were throwing up all over the place
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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