What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
