I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize