I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
We left an ass print on the piano.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize