I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
