I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
where does the pee come out of this thing
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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