whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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