No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I need a beard to bite.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
