You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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