just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
