She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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