Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
