I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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