9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
