I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Mom said you looked used
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
i think i just lost a toe
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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