everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Randomize
