:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
