just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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