: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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