If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
