I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I think I sprained my soul last night
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
