I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize