in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
