I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
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