Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize
