fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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