It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize