we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
