well you can't waste a boner
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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