I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
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