what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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