I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Let's paint friendship bongs
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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