My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
