is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize