So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
