your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize