is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
