Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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