My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
