omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Is Oprah even human
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize