after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
