went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
