Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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