I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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