we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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