your room smells of hookers.
And success
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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