dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
