Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
