i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
