seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Randomize
