I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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